steepholm (steepholm) wrote,

How to make the shortlist

After an intensive statistical study of the children's books that publishers and booksellers choose to promote, I have finally come up with a sure-fire prize-winning historical fantasy title. So, watch the bookstalls for: The Gravedigger's Wife's Daughter's Apprentice: Being the Life and Misadventures of Mithras Spongedrake, Golem of this Parish. To be Sold at the Sign of the Gnaw'd Rope, by the Church of SS. Tibor of Prague and Mary the Absent. I see it being printed on handpressed paper and sold with uncut pages - perhaps with a matching paperknife glued to the back cover.

Now the only problem is, how am I going to spend that advance...?

Tags: books
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